Listening in sales: Is it a lost art?

Has this ever happened to you? You had an initial meeting with a prospective client. You asked that prospect what seemed to be all the right questions. You had what felt to you like a good conversation, and based on that conversation, you scheduled the next meeting, went back, presented your proposal, and …it bombed.

There are a lot of possible reasons for that outcome, but today, consider this possibility: You weren’t listening actively. If that’s the case, you might have missed important elements of what the prospect really wanted to say. There are several indicators that you or your salespeople can monitor to practice the discipline of really listening intently to your customers and prospective clients.

First, if you’re thinking of what you’re going to say next during a conversation with the prospect, you’re probably not really hearing what they’re saying in that moment. We call this malady competitive listening. Second, if a salesperson is talking for more than 60 seconds at a time, there’s a good chance he or she may be dominating the conversation. Paying attention to this important indicator can help you follow the 70-30 rule which means listening 70 percent of the time and only talking 30 percent of the time.

Finally, consider this. To the average salesperson, anything more than two seconds of silence can be an unbearable pause, which will tempt them to jump in and start talking or keep talking. A salesperson who is a great listener will embrace that silence to give the prospect time to reflect, feed back and continue sharing.

Here’s a process that will help your salespeople listen actively during your discussions with a prospect or client:

Step 1: Recognize the real goal of all your communication. When we communicate, we have an innate need to be understood and acknowledged. That means Step 1 is letting your prospect or customer know that he has been heard and understood! There are two ways to do this. You can paraphrase what your prospective client just shared with you – that is, feed back to them what you heard them say in your words. An even stronger technique is to use restatement, which is to restate exactly what the prospect just shared using their exact words.

Step 2: Send subtle messages that say, “I hear you, I’m paying attention,” as the other person speaks. When you are engaged in a conversation, how do you let the other party know that you are listening and understand what he or she is saying? Simply nod your head or say, “I see,” “OK,” or “That makes sense,” each time she makes a point.

Step 3: Before making points of your own, restate key content to prove you were really listening and really do understand what was said. Active listening is the process of reflecting back to the speaker the message you heard in order to confirm or correct your understanding. That is accomplished by summarizing the speaker’s message and asking for confirmation or, if needed, clarification.

Here’s an example of Step 3 in action:

Prospect: “Minimizing equipment down time is our primary goal. When we have to take equipment off line for maintenance, it totally disrupts our production schedule and filling orders on time, and then I have the VP of Sales breathing down my neck.”

Salesperson: “So, your primary goal is to minimize equipment down time so you don’t disrupt the production schedule and negatively impact your ability to fill orders. That will stop the production back-ups and also keep the VP of Sales from breathing down your neck. Did I miss anything?”

Notice that your summary may incorporate the speaker’s exact phrases and statements, or you can paraphrase them.

If you follow these three simple steps – understand the true goal of your communication, send
the right subtle “I’m listening” signals as the other person is speaking, and restate key content
to prove you really were listening – you’ll have better conversations, gather high-quality information and make better recommendations. Last but certainly not least, you’ll improve your closing ratio!

Bob Bolak is president of Sandler Training. Contact him at bbolak@sandler.com.

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